A couple nights ago I had been at work for about ten minutes when Simon appeared behind me and said, "I'm gonna ring for you for a minute. Justin wants to talk to you." I felt my heart stop. The only time Justin or Mark wanted to talk to you was if you were in trouble (Or if you were being sent to Hooksett which is a whole other story). I grinned apprehensively at my bagger Jeremy who also knew I was most likely in trouble. I walked slowly, hunched over and hanging my head, over to where Justin was standing by the rack of carriages.
He was grinning like he always was when he said, "You have a coupon issue." I immediately started thinking of all the times I found coupons around my register and couldn't remember if I entered them or not.
"Oooh," I said, "yeah." He saw the realization on my face and said, "You know what I'm talking about?" Still smiling.
"I think so," I said.
"There was a Kashi coupon..." Nope, not what I thought he was talking about. I put a confuised look on.
"It was for a free Kashi product and there was a space to fill in the amount..." Crap I knew exactly what he was talking about now.
"Instead of putting the price of the item in, you put the maximum amount. The maximum price on the coupon was $5 and the product was only $3 so you gave money away."
WOOOOOW. OH NO! I GAVE SOMEONE AN EXTRA 2 DOLLARS ON A COUPON! OUR STORE IS GOING TO GO BANKRUPT AT MY HANDS!
Do you know how many coupons I give away? Because customers won't give up. They will fight me tooth and nail for their 30 cents off. It says right there on the coupon that it's a dollar off if you buy TWO 6 packs of water, but they won't listen.
"Well the sign said."
"Well it's in the flyer."
"Well I heard it being announced."
So I don't even argue with people anymore I just type in all the coupons manually.
Because really, $2 may be a HUGE deal to the customer, but not to me. I do what I have to do to preserve my sanity.
And I'm a little concerned with how Mark knew I did that with that coupon. He must have had to look through my folder and find the $5 coupon and then look through every single one of my receipts to find the order it was used on and then scan through the list and find the Kashi product. Really? Really?
"I'm sorry," I said to Justin trying to look sheepish.
"It's okay," he said.
"Am I in trouble?"
"No just don't do it again," he said.
Oooooookayyyyyy. From now on I will scroll one at a time all the way to the top of the massive list of items I just rung through to find the item's actual price so that I don't cheat the huge, wealthy grocery store out of a dollar.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Monday, February 20, 2012
The register of doom and isolation
I have to rant really quickly about a certain fellow employee. First I have to give you some background on how much I HATE being on register number 17, the Express Lane. It's all the grumpy, rude, angry people. They pay with hundred dollar bills, go far over the 12 item limit (sometimes going so far as to divide their 36 items into three separate orders), and yell at me when I don't know where their Marlboro 100 lights box red menthol green gold silver pack is. Does it look like I smoke?
Oh quick side rant within a rant here, I find it funny how I can always tell when people are going to buy cigarettes. There's just something about the unnaturally tan looking skin or the dead hair.
Anyways, I hate being on 17. Mostly because I'm all alone with no bagger. I mean, yeah it's only 12ish items, but it's still stressful being so far away and isolated from everyone. So tonight I was on register 10. My favorite. I saw Mary go up to Christina and Erin with her drawer and they told her to go on number 17. Well she whined and complained soooooooo much that they said, "Okay go on 10." Are you serious...... Guess who got stuck on 17? Me. And when I was over there she mouthed to me, "Ha ha." I wanted to trip her or something. So not fair.
Oh quick side rant within a rant here, I find it funny how I can always tell when people are going to buy cigarettes. There's just something about the unnaturally tan looking skin or the dead hair.
Anyways, I hate being on 17. Mostly because I'm all alone with no bagger. I mean, yeah it's only 12ish items, but it's still stressful being so far away and isolated from everyone. So tonight I was on register 10. My favorite. I saw Mary go up to Christina and Erin with her drawer and they told her to go on number 17. Well she whined and complained soooooooo much that they said, "Okay go on 10." Are you serious...... Guess who got stuck on 17? Me. And when I was over there she mouthed to me, "Ha ha." I wanted to trip her or something. So not fair.
No good, stealing gypsies
Okay, so here's an interesting story. There's this absolutely insane woman who comes to Grocery Store pretty often to wreak havoc. Sometimes she comes alone and sometimes she comes with her psychotic kids. There are all these stories about her that go around between coworkers.
She will walk over to the bakery, and you know how there are discounted cakes because they have some kind of minor defect? well she would take a perfectly fine cake, shake it up, bring it to the woman in the bakery and ask to have it discounted. Really? Are you that much of a lowlife? And she has also been known to open a container of cookies, shove them in her kids pockets and then throw the container away. There are also stories about her and her kin that go beyond the grocery store.
The rumor is that she's a gypsy. Her and her 30 kids or so live in a trailer or roam around. Timmy told me some of the older kids have gotten expelled for getting into fights.
Anyways, she is a complete menace. And she has this stupid hat, like a beanie, that she wears on the veryyyyy top of her head so it sticks straight up, but it's barely on her head. Every time I see her I just want to shove the stupid hat over her head. The first time I met her was the single most traumatic, entertaining experience of my short, unfulfilled life.
Here's the story:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1okEFlJeLy6mGFPe0PVHNgzLb3nac-eTUzmpb_vGaFpE/edit
She will walk over to the bakery, and you know how there are discounted cakes because they have some kind of minor defect? well she would take a perfectly fine cake, shake it up, bring it to the woman in the bakery and ask to have it discounted. Really? Are you that much of a lowlife? And she has also been known to open a container of cookies, shove them in her kids pockets and then throw the container away. There are also stories about her and her kin that go beyond the grocery store.
The rumor is that she's a gypsy. Her and her 30 kids or so live in a trailer or roam around. Timmy told me some of the older kids have gotten expelled for getting into fights.
Anyways, she is a complete menace. And she has this stupid hat, like a beanie, that she wears on the veryyyyy top of her head so it sticks straight up, but it's barely on her head. Every time I see her I just want to shove the stupid hat over her head. The first time I met her was the single most traumatic, entertaining experience of my short, unfulfilled life.
Here's the story:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1okEFlJeLy6mGFPe0PVHNgzLb3nac-eTUzmpb_vGaFpE/edit
Stupid people making me look bad
This woman came through my line and started putting all her groceries on the cart like normal. I said, "Hi how are you?" and she smiled and said, "Good thanks." I started ringing her items through which she can clearly see and not to mention the belt is moving. My bagger bags the items and puts them in her cart when she brings it down. I then tell her the amount and she hands me a piece of paper that makes me want to rip her throat out. "Oh, this is a WIC," she says.
When someone has a WIC they are supposed to tell you before you start because on the screen you have to hit "WIC transaction" and type in all the dates, and put the voucher through the printer. It's a process. I tried really hard to keep my face calm, but I'm not sure how well that worked out.
I flashed my light for asisstance and Christina came over. What I wanted to say was, "This idiot forgot to tell me her order was a WIC so I have to start over." But the customer is always right so I said, "This was supposed to be a WIC." Christina sighed and started to void off every item one by one and voided out the order. Then we had to take all the bags out of the carriage and take all the items out of the bags. I stood there uselessly as Christina hit WIC transaction and rang through every item again.
At the end she handed me the receipt to give to the customer, glared at me and said with such an attitude, "Next time hit WIC transaction." She walked away in a huff and I was left standing there with steam coming out of my ears. I handed the receipt to that insufferable woman and didn't say a word.
When someone has a WIC they are supposed to tell you before you start because on the screen you have to hit "WIC transaction" and type in all the dates, and put the voucher through the printer. It's a process. I tried really hard to keep my face calm, but I'm not sure how well that worked out.
I flashed my light for asisstance and Christina came over. What I wanted to say was, "This idiot forgot to tell me her order was a WIC so I have to start over." But the customer is always right so I said, "This was supposed to be a WIC." Christina sighed and started to void off every item one by one and voided out the order. Then we had to take all the bags out of the carriage and take all the items out of the bags. I stood there uselessly as Christina hit WIC transaction and rang through every item again.
At the end she handed me the receipt to give to the customer, glared at me and said with such an attitude, "Next time hit WIC transaction." She walked away in a huff and I was left standing there with steam coming out of my ears. I handed the receipt to that insufferable woman and didn't say a word.
The excruciating pain that hundred dollar bills can cause
If someone's total comes to $92 and they hand be a hundred dollar bill or $289 and they pay with two hundred dollar bills, it's not a big deal. But when the total is only $6.58 and I am handed a hundred, I want to rip into little pieces and scream. I am not your personal bank! The worst is when I see them flipping through bills in their wallet. 20, 20, 20, 20, 10, 10, 5, 5, bunch of ones and then, "Oh here's this one hundred dollar bill for you because you obviously don't hate life enough." I have noticed that there's a certain profile that goes along with the person who pays with hundred dollar bills.
Here's the link to part of an essay I wrote about the different types of people and how they pay: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_XZ4hpnEYDnJBYOfmpkhX0D0uFflydFKkB2kCdy_mnw/edit
Here's the link to part of an essay I wrote about the different types of people and how they pay: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_XZ4hpnEYDnJBYOfmpkhX0D0uFflydFKkB2kCdy_mnw/edit
Friday, February 17, 2012
"If I had a card for every store I shopped at, my wallet would be THIS BIG!"
It was a pretty slow night and this old guy came through my line. He bought $50 worth of cat food. When it was rung through and bagged, he asked for a pen, filled out his check and handed it to me.
"Do you have a Grocery Store card?" I asked.
"Nope," he said smugly, "It's so stupid when stores have cards. I don't believe in them."
I fought to keep my eyes from rolling and flashed my light on for assistance. Justin came over and I explained to him, "This man wants to write a check, but doesn't have a Grocery Store card." Typical ignorant shopper. I bet he also doesn't know the store closes at 9:00.
"Oh, that's okay," Justin said, "We can sign you up for a card right now--"
"I don't want a card!" The man cut in rudely. He looked at Justin and squinted his eyes sort of like he was sizing him up.
"Every store has these useless cards," he said to Justin and I, "Well, if I had a card for every store I shopped at my wallet would be THIS BIG!" As he said it, he spread his arms out dramatically.
I was trying to keep my smiling from turning into full blown laughter. Josh was grinning, but he literally always has a grin on his face even when he is delivering bad news.
"Yeah, I understand," Justin said and I nodded sympathetically as if we didn't think he was a crazy old man who should just shut up and get the card. "But you need to have a Market Basket card to pay with a check." The old man was outraged.
"Fine! Fine. Okay. Well, you can put all this back!" he said throwing his bag of cat food on the register, making a scene now. "And I want my check back!" He ripped it out of my hand. I lost some control and started to laugh. Justin and I exchanged looks and I could tell he was about to laugh.
The old man stuffed the check into his pocket mumbling angrily words like "Ridiculous" and "Stupid" and "Unbelievable".
The head of the Front End, Mark, was standing in front of the desk with his arms crossed, a smirk on his face. He had been watching the whole thing and I could tell he thought it was so funny. As the man walked by him muttering loudly and clearly, Mark called out with a huge smile, "Thanks for shopping!!" The man spluttered, "I DIDN'T!" and kept walking.
"Have a great night sir!" Mark called after him.
"I WON'T!"
Mark was laughing now. A few minutes later I saw Justin explaining what had happened to the assistant managers, spreading his arms out to imitate the old man.
"Do you have a Grocery Store card?" I asked.
"Nope," he said smugly, "It's so stupid when stores have cards. I don't believe in them."
I fought to keep my eyes from rolling and flashed my light on for assistance. Justin came over and I explained to him, "This man wants to write a check, but doesn't have a Grocery Store card." Typical ignorant shopper. I bet he also doesn't know the store closes at 9:00.
"Oh, that's okay," Justin said, "We can sign you up for a card right now--"
"I don't want a card!" The man cut in rudely. He looked at Justin and squinted his eyes sort of like he was sizing him up.
"Every store has these useless cards," he said to Justin and I, "Well, if I had a card for every store I shopped at my wallet would be THIS BIG!" As he said it, he spread his arms out dramatically.
I was trying to keep my smiling from turning into full blown laughter. Josh was grinning, but he literally always has a grin on his face even when he is delivering bad news.
"Yeah, I understand," Justin said and I nodded sympathetically as if we didn't think he was a crazy old man who should just shut up and get the card. "But you need to have a Market Basket card to pay with a check." The old man was outraged.
"Fine! Fine. Okay. Well, you can put all this back!" he said throwing his bag of cat food on the register, making a scene now. "And I want my check back!" He ripped it out of my hand. I lost some control and started to laugh. Justin and I exchanged looks and I could tell he was about to laugh.
The old man stuffed the check into his pocket mumbling angrily words like "Ridiculous" and "Stupid" and "Unbelievable".
The head of the Front End, Mark, was standing in front of the desk with his arms crossed, a smirk on his face. He had been watching the whole thing and I could tell he thought it was so funny. As the man walked by him muttering loudly and clearly, Mark called out with a huge smile, "Thanks for shopping!!" The man spluttered, "I DIDN'T!" and kept walking.
"Have a great night sir!" Mark called after him.
"I WON'T!"
Mark was laughing now. A few minutes later I saw Justin explaining what had happened to the assistant managers, spreading his arms out to imitate the old man.
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